Level-set: Equity outflow up, GOOG way up, Yen way down

Top stories of the past week

1) U.S. outflows sustained
U.S. equity funds saw net redemptions for the fourth consecutive week, with $1.2B redeemed. Investors are nervous! But on the surface, they look calm and ready.

2) GOOG way up
Alphabet flexed on the market nerves by saying “we have so much cash, we want you to have some”. They announced their first-ever dividend and a $70b share buyback program. Investors loved it. GOOG is back above $2T in market cap.

3) Yen way down
The Japanese yen hit a 34-year low relative to the USD on Friday. Pundits (one of my least favourite words) point to sticky U.S. inflation and high rates as the core drivers. For those who have always wanted to ride a bullet train while drinking a peach soda you bought from a road-side vending machine in Tsukiji market: やれ (Yare) ((do it)).

Top WEIRD stories of the past week

1) Five military horses got loose in central London and caused an appropriate amount of chaos. Makes me want to re-watch Hidalgo for the 17th time.

2) In what is unquestionably a hate crime specifically against me, Milan is trying to ban all late-night takeaway pizza, ice cream, and anything else good. Is Professor Umbridge the Mayor of Milan?

3) An absolutely heroic wine merchant ran the London marathon and blind-tasted 25 glasses in the process. Interestingly, he said it made the run a bit easier - some advice for us all.

You like charts? Graphs? Of course you do.

Quarterly U.S. GDP Growth:

On this day…

…in 1769, James Watt patented the steam engine in England.