Level-set: GRWMs, ATHs, and old people fighting

Huge week! Or, as the Donald says, “Yuge”. Our first week telling you about stuff that happened in the world that we felt compelled to talk about etc. etc.!

So what’s gucci these days? Meh, the usual. Thanks for asking.

*As of March 17, 2024 @ 4:39pm EST. Source: CoinGecko.com 

Top stories of the past week

1) Say goodbye to GRWMs?

If you understood that title, congrats (I guess?) you’re under the age of 30 and will be distressed to learn that TikTok may be banned in the US. The US House of Representatives just passed a bill demanding that ByteDance, the owner of TikTok, sell its controlling stake, or the app would be banned in the States. OMG IDGAF.

2) Biden vs. Trump rematch set

Biden and Trump are now officially back in the ring for the 2024 US presidential election after getting their parties’ nominations. Watching old people fight is not so much a hobby as it is a passion of mine, so this should be a good year.

3) BTC BULL SZN

Bitcoin hit an all-time high of USD $73,737.94 on Thursday before dropping a bit. The OG crypto has been on an absolute tear, up over 30% in the past month. This is the first time Bitcoin has hit a new all-time high before the halving, which is set to take place around April 20, 2024. Are you a hodler or a hater? A zoomer or a boomer?

Top WEIRD stories of the past week

1) A pack of rodents got stoned after wisely raiding a New Orleans Police evidence room.

2) New York resident vows to regain custody of his adorable 11-foot, 750lb pet crocodile after authorities removed him; probably for the best.

3) Deez Nuts, a Wisconsin resident, was arrested. Why isn’t this on the front page of every newspaper worldwide?

You like charts? Graphs? Of course you do.

On this day…

Seven years ago we were blessed with one of the best news stories of all time. A leprechaun was definitely discovered in Alabama as captured in this legendary YouTube video.

Banger of the week:

Meme? Nah. Art.